Remember One of Our Own: George Hodgins

Zoe Gross illusionofcompetence.blogspot.com Zoe and her father Rob light candles in honor of George Hodgins. Photo © 2012 Steve Silberman Zoe is an autistic self-advocate. She recently organized and led a vigil to remember and honor George Hodgins. She read the words below at the ceremony, which was attended by self-advocates and their supporters — many of whom had been part of George’s life. Many of whom spoke out themselves. —- Last Tuesday, George Hodgins was shot and killed by his mother, who then killed herself. George lived here in Sunnyvale and he was 22 years old. I didn’t know George, but I can’t stop thinking about him. Maybe it’s because we have a lot in common — we lived near each other, we were the same age, we’re both autistic, although we led very different lives. I would like to have met George, but I can only mourn him.…

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Let Me Stim, Let Me Stim, Let Me Stim

The holidays are upon us, and that means hanging with folks who might need a nudge or a gentle reminder about holiday kindness and accommodation for autistic kids and adults, on being nice about understanding autistic behaviors versus assuming naughtiness. One thing we’ll be seeing in our house as my son adjusts to an atypical schedule is stimming. Lots of stimming. Some of Leo’s stimming needs redirecting, but most of it is functional and self-soothing. Our friends and family get why Leo stims and what he needs, they have his back; Leo will be fine, we’ll be fine. But if you or your child need stimming functionality backup or want to help understand why stimming doesn’t just matter but can be very necessary, I suggest citing Zoe’s About Stimming, or Julia Bascom’s The Obsessive Joy of Autism. Or, you could just sing folks this song, which I came up with…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Ten: Paula C. Durbin-Westby

We held a dialogue series last week between self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network; and parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords. The series continued this week with Melody Latimer, director of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network’s Dallas-Ft. Worth chapter and blogger at ASParenting, Kassiane of Radical Neurodivergence Speaking, who prefers the term “advocate,” self-advocate Amanda Forest Vivian, blogger at I’m Somewhere Else, and autism parent Kristina Chew, who blogs at We Go With Him and Care2.com. You can read the entire series at thinkingautismguide.blogspot.com/search/label/dialogue Our thanks, once more, to everyone who had participated in the Dialogues. We’ll wrap up with a reminder of why we hosted this series in the first place: Because it needs to happen. Because being a parent of a disabled child is not the same experience…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Nine: Kristina Chew

We held a dialogue series last week between self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network; and parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords. The series continued this week with Melody Latimer, director of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network’s Dallas-Ft. Worth chapter and blogger at ASParenting, Kassiane of Radical Neurodivergence Speaking, who prefers the term “advocate,” and self-advocate Amanda Forest Vivian, blogger at I’m Somewhere Else. You can read the entire series at thinkingautismguide.blogspot.com/search/label/dialogue. Today’s post is by autism parent Kristina Chew, who blogs at We Go With Him and Care2.com. -The Editors —- What A Parent Can Learn From This Dialogue As I started teaching my first class (8am, Elementary Latin) of the 2011-2012 school year, the thought occurred to me: The freshmen students in the first few rows are just a…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Eight: Amanda Forest Vivian

We held a dialogue series last week between self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network; and parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords. The series continued this week with Melody Latimer, director of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network’s Dallas-Ft. Worth chapter and blogger at ASParenting, and Kassiane of Radical Neurodivergence Speaking, who prefers the term “advocate.” Stay tuned for two more autism parent posts: One from a neurotypical perspective, and one from an Autistic perspective. You can read the entire series at thinkingautismguide.blogspot.com/search/label/dialogue. Today’s post is by self-advocate Amanda Forest Vivian, blogger at I’m Somewhere Else. -The Editors —- This is just a theory, so be gentle. But I think a lot of problems between non-disabled people and disabled people might have to do with the fact that for most born-disabled people,…

The Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Seven: Kassiane

We held a dialogue series last week between parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords; and self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network. Readers let us know that they wanted more, and more perspectives, so we’re continuing the series through this week, and original participants Zoe, Rob, and Ari are stepping back and letting other voices have the floor.  This week’s first post was from a representative of both parties: Melody Latimer, director of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network’s Dallas-Ft. Worth chapter, and blogger at ASParenting. You can read the entire series at thinkingautismguide.blogspot.com/search/label/dialogue For those who note that these Dialogues are a challenging and thorny process, and wonder about the usefulness of participation, consider a comment left on Melody’s post by OutOutOut: “I’m tired of the fighting, too. I really am.…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Six: Melody Latimer

We held a dialogue series last week between parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords; and self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network, You can read the entire series at thinkingautismguide.blogspot.com/search/label/dialogue Readers let us know that they wanted more, and more perspectives, so we’re going to continue the series through this week. Original participants Zoe, Rob, and Ari are stepping back and letting other voices have the floor. Today’s post is from Melody Latimer, director of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network’s Dallas-Ft. Worth chapter, and blogger at ASParenting. -The Editors —- My favorite Autism “quote” is one we all know too well. “When you know one Autistic person, you know one Autistic person.” Given, there are variations to this, but this is the way I like to phrase it. In my world,…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues: Intermission

We are going to continue the Dialogues, at least through next week. (The entire series can be found at thinkingautismguide.blogspot.com/search/label/dialogue.) We’ve heard from readers that they’d like to see Dialogues posts from perspectives including self-advocates parenting children with disabilities, late-diagnosed self-advocates, and parents of children with autism. And, as commenter, advocate, and parent Cheri wrote in regards to the Day Five post from Robert Rummel-Hudson: “I imagine that engaging in this dialogue may have been uncomfortable, and I commend every one of you for agreeing to do it. This final post leaves me wanting — hoping — for more. I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m not sensing any closure here.” We don’t have closure. We need to continue the conversation. How? Self-advocate Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg also commented on the Day Five post, with insights as to how she has synthesized and recommends approaching the Dialogues overall (she is not…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Five: Robert Rummel-Hudson

We’re hosting a dialogue series this week, between parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords; and self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network. Why? We want to encourage constructive conversations about disability. Zoe and Rob disconnected spectacularly last month. If you don’t know the backstory, see Rob’s post, and Zoe’s reaction. Neither is satisfied with the way that scenario played out; they are using this space to attempt a do-over.  Dialogues Day One: Zoe Dialogues Day Two: Robert Rummel-Hudson Dialogues Day Three: Ari Ne’eman Dialogues Day Four: Zoe Robert Rummel-Hudson has the floor again today. All the participants — writers and commenters — have our gratitude. Not every exchange has led to greater understanding, but many did, and that could not have happened without you. -The Editors —-  The world is…

The Self-Advocate/Parent Dialogues, Day Four: Zoe

We’re hosting a dialogue series this week, between parent Robert Rummel-Hudson, author of Schuyler’s Monster and blogger at Fighting Monsters With Rubber Swords; and self-advocates Zoe, blogger at Illusion of Competence, and Ari Ne’eman, President and co-founder of The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network. Why? We want to encourage constructive conversations about disability. Zoe and Rob disconnected spectacularly last month. If you don’t know the backstory, see Rob’s post, and Zoe’s reaction. Neither is satisfied with the way that scenario played out; they are using this space to attempt a do-over. Dialogues Day One: Zoe Dialogues Day Two: Robert Rummel-Hudson Dialogues Day Three: Ari Ne’eman Zoe has the floor again today. -The Editors —- Dear Robert, In your letter on Tuesday, you were adamant that parents have a place in the disability rights movement. I want to begin by letting you know that we are in vehement agreement on this point: in…