grief Archives — THINKING PERSON'S GUIDE TO AUTISM

The author's cat Timon, a ginger tabby, held in the author's arms.

The Day My Cat Died: On Autism and Grief

February 7, 2026 • By Martine Mussies

Autistic people often process information differently, and grief is no exception. Here are tips for navigating grief as an autistic person.

Illustration showing a bright white moon through bare white winter trees. A person wearing a yellow hoodie with the hood up is sitting on a bed, crying.

Grieving While Autistic

September 1, 2021 • By Jess Hudgins

I could only feel was what was missing. I couldn’t hear his voice. I couldn’t smell him near me. There were no more cuddles and no more hugs. That the sensory input of love and family that I had known every day since I born was no longer in my life.

Newborn baby on its belly, seen from above, lying on a fuzzy mat on an even bigger fuzzy bear cushion.

Parents: Let’s Talk About Grief and Disability

February 14, 2018 • By Jeff Newman

During my 15 of autism activism, I’ve seen tremendous positive change in what people—including parents—believe about autism, but this “grief” crap JUST WON’T DIE.

Helping Autistic Children Understand Death and Dying

October 1, 2017 • By Shannon Des Roches Rosa

Maxfield Sparrow unstrangemind.com Photo © Benedic Belen | Flickr/Creative Commons [Image: Black-and-white photo of an Asian woman comforting a small crying child who is wearing a tiara, and has their hands over their face.] The Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism asked Autistic adults to fill out a survey about death and dying to create a

Letting Tears Flow

May 1, 2013 • By Jen Myers

Melody Latimer asparenting.com At some point, everyone will have to deal with loss and grief. Whether it’s the loss of a pet, relative, or friend, it can affect us in ways we never expected. I recently suffered a loss that was unexpected and quite possibly the hardest thing I’ve ever had to endure in my

Graphic with the title "Karla's Emotion Picture (FYI)" Vertical rectangle divided into five horizontal bars. To the left is an upward facing arrow labeled, "intensity" The bottom bar is white and labeled "Unaware". Text to its right reads, "When I was younger I was 100% unaware of any sort of emotion in me and would be shocked when I was in a meltdown all of a sudden. It still happens sometimes today though I try to actively practice awareness of my physical and emotional selves in order to survive." The next bar up is green and labeled "Happy or Sad". Text to its right reads, "Everything is just fine. I am a mostly happy being and sometimes sad. Neither of these emotions are bad to my current awareness nor cause me distress that I know of". Between the green bar and the next bar up is a dotted line labeled "Emotional Regulation Line" Next bar up is yellow and labeled "Some Fear/Anger". Text to its right reads, "I will feel 'off' here but most of the time I cannot articulate what that means and often cannot tie it to any one thing". Next bar up is red and labeled "Bigger Fear/Anger". Text to its right reads, "Here I know FOR SURE that if I do not take corrective action that I will have a Meltdown. Again I sometimes am not sure why this is happening. Mostly I just need to be left alone here." The top bar is black and labeled "Meltdown". Text to its right reads, "A meltdown to me is an intense mixture of fear and anger and other emotions that confuse me. Sometimes I laugh due to the confusion when nothing about it is 'funny'."

Autistic Grief Is Not Like Neurotypical Grief

August 1, 2012 • By Karla Fisher

There really are no good articles on how to help an autistic person process grief. It is with this hole in mind that I create this article.

Processing Grief After a Child’s ASD Diagnosis

March 18, 2011 • By Shannon Des Roches Rosa

Sharon Morris sharon-theawfultruth.blogspot.com I’m a new arrival to Planet ASD. I use this analogy deliberately as it does feel as though I have stepped through, or fallen into, a wormhole opening to another universe. I wonder where all these research papers, all these treatment models, all these parents and children, and their courageous stories have

Cycles of Grief and Parenting a Child With Special Needs

October 29, 2010 • By Shannon Des Roches Rosa

Jennifer Minnelli, M.S., CCC-SLP www.autismsphere.com The grief process, for a parent coming to terms with having a child with special needs, differs from the grief process that one might undergo with the death of a close family member. At a certain point, with a death, there is the finality of the headstone, and the cold

Getting to Know Your New Neighborhood: Reaching Out and Building a Network

August 13, 2010 • By Shannon Des Roches Rosa

Susan Walton www.discoveringfamilyfun.com It’s important to realize that you cannot cope with this new element of your life alone. And you shouldn’t try. There is help out there for you, for your child, and for your family, and you should take advantage of it. In addition to uncovering the services and agencies that offer assistance,

On Autism and Self-Compassion

July 28, 2010 • By Shannon Des Roches Rosa

Kristin Neff Ph. D. www.self-compassion.org www.horseboymovie.com My field of study is self-compassion, it’s what I do all my research on, and I’m writing a book. One of the things that this practice has given me is that I’m really okay with being my honest, authentic self. It’s not that I like people judging me. It